Seems like my life is always in some kind of tiny crisis. The latest one involves employment. Remember that new girl that started at my job a couple of weeks ago? Yeah, well something came up in her record or something so she's been let go. The girl was kind of a ditz though, to be honest. Nice, but a little ditzy. Apparently she did pretty well at work with the little (but important) tasks, aside from accidentally selling a policy to herself. Anyway, the point is, I'm still the only bilingual person at work and totally not getting paid for it. It's not so much about the money, while would be nice to have some more cash, it's more about feeling like my time there is worth it. Yeah, I get paid SOME commission but I hate working on commission. It's a bit more stressful than I'd like considering I get paid less than a cashier at Walmart.
So, I wanted to quit my job pretty soon because I'm feeling burntout and trapped. I tell my mom about my plan and she was mostly okay with it. Then I told my dad... welp, he didn't like the idea too much. He wants me to have a job before I quit the one I have now, which I agree would be the best thing to do but I'm a weakling, I'm tired all the time, and my immunity has gone to shit since working at Insurance Place. I'm DONE. If I wait to get a new job then I could be at Insurance Place for another five months, or longer. Plus, it's hard to set-up job interviews when I'm unavailable 60% of the hours in the week. So, I was feeling pretty hopeless but then my mom... My awesome, genius of a mom suggested I apply to be a substitute teacher as a back up. If they hire me and set me up to have orientation in January I can go ahead and quit, exhaust my time with school and looking for a new job but if nothing comes up I can still count on the substituting job. I'm not ecstatic about it, considering I'm not sure how qualified I am to substitute but I'm glad that a plan has been set forth!
I guess I'm feeling a little more driven lately. I'm just not happy with my lack of results so all I can do is work harder to get what I want, which in the short run is a better job and possibly a new place to live. Still trying to figure that second one out. I could be stuck living with some relatives, while are caring and generous, are also overbearing, pushy and have very different political/religious views as me. I can only keep my mouth shut for so long. I need more freedom, not less of it.
Sorry to go on ranting about. I know most of you probably don't care about this, but I suppose I just needed to see it typed out. I'll probably be bitching about money and my relationship with it pretty soon.
Stay excellent,
~C.M. xx
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