SHIT THAT ANNOYS ME: Nomophobia

Today at school after my BCIS class, which is one of the most mind-numbing courses I've ever taken, I passed by a bulletin board and a report on NOMOPHOBIA was pinned to it. I stopped to skim it. If you're wondering, nomophobia is the faux-scientific term for the fear of losing one's mobile (phone). Silly. After watching Glee and New Girl I stuck around to watch the local news and they did a story (if you can call it that) on this very subject! What a damn coinkidink, y'all. If you'd like to watch it and rot some brain cells and marvel at some of the biggest hair this side of El Rio Grande you can click on this:

CALL ME CRAZY but this all sounds like a bunch of bullshit. If I feel any anxiety over losing my phone it's because 1. it's expensive to replace and mostly 2. it'd upset my parents. My dad's even teased me for having my phone on me all the time. It's his own fault, anyway. My father is MEXICAN and high-strung. He NEEDS to know where I am at all times and freaks out whenever I don't answer my phone. His default thinking leads him to believe I'm in peril at all moments that I'm not within his sight. Oh, and I guess I'm 5 years old too. Bah.

Stay excellent, you guys.

~C.M. xx

SHIT THAT ANNOYS ME: Santana Lopez

Yeah, yeah, I watch Glee, let's get ALLLL those giggles out now. Are you done? Okay. So for my second (I think it's second?) installment of SHIT THAT ANNOYS ME I've decided to blog about a fictional character, Santana Lopez of Glee. I originally planned on posting about this right before the (spoiler alert) episode in which everyone finds out Santana is a lesbian and Finn, of all people makes her realize that she doesn't have to be alone in her struggle and for one lone moment we're lead to believe that the bitch has a heart. Don't get me wrong, Naya Rivera is probably the sweetest person, and hell can she sing, but the way her character has been written rubs me all kind of wrong.

If I remember correctly, Santana is supposed to be Mexican. Naya is partially of Puerto Rican descent for starters. Her Spanish... is not that great. To me, if one is going to portray a Mexican character on TV who is supposedly proud of her roots, wouldn't she be able to speak it a bit better?

Santana is mean, vindictive and manipulative. It's like the only way she can communicate is by being a total BITCH. Is that how Mexican girls are supposed to be portrayed? As firey, hot-tempered super-bitches? I thought maybe after the whole, "we love you as you are, Santana! Being a lesbian isn't the end of the world, Santana!" episode she'd calm down her bitch, but NO. On last night's episode she anonymously complained to the administration about Mr. Shue's lack of passion in teaching Spanish. INSTEAD of addressing him directly as she has had no problem in the past doing, she decided to be underhanded and go over his head.

Also, I know A LOT of people love Brittana but I, for one will call BULLSHIT. BUUUUUUUUUULLLSHIT. Lesbians are awesome and all that. Shit, I've almost never been shy to admit that I find plenty of women attractive but my qualm here is that Santana, again is manipulative. She convinced Brittany that making out with each other was innocent, was not out of love and she pushed her away tons of times. She manipulated Brittany (while she was dating Artie) into believing that their making out wasn't cheating because they were girls. Would someone who truly loves another do that to them? I don't think so. I don't care what orientation you are, that shit DOES NOT FLY. Brittany was more than willing to announce her love for Santana but Ms. Lopez was reluctant to do so. I get it, because she was afraid of her stupid HIGH SCHOOL reputation if it got out that she liked chicks, but hey, for love, wouldn't you do anything? It took her like a season and a half to finally date Brittany in public. If Brittany was my friend, I wouldn't take too kindly to Santana treating her that way.

So what do you think? Do I have Santana all wrong or did I open your eyes to the crappily-written character that she is?

~C.M. xx

SHIT THAT ANNOYS ME: American Apparel and their BIG Problem

I'm a consumer. As gross as it is sometimes, I do like to shop and I realize that by shopping at certain places it's kind of like I'm promoting the ideals of said store, and it says something about me. But sometimes some things are so good to worry about how douche-y it makes me seem. One of those being... American Apparel.

This is a pretty typical American Apparel ad. They're heavy on the sex appeal and minimalism. It's a hipster store, pretty much. Everything is expensive, but it's also made in the U.S. of A. No overseas sweatshops to keep the prices low. I LOVE their men's t-shirts. Super comfy and they keep well. I still have an American Apparel tee that I bought in '06 with no holes or wear. Anyway, since I'm plus-size I can only wear the men's clothing for the most part and some accesories. Recently American Apparel announced a plus-sized model search and the introduction of a size XL for women, which is about a 12/14, still too small for me, womp womp. Despite not being big enough for chunky me I was excited and continued to read the announcement and noticed some odd... language. For one thing the contest was looking for "The Next Big Thing". The description of the contest went on and on with euphemistic fattie jargon. I thought it was kind of weird and for a moment thought to comment on the story which popped up in my Facebook feed but I'd once pointed out anti-fat promos on Forever 21's page before and it was a headache. I bit my digital tongue... but I wasn't the only one who noticed, and not everyone was so quiet about the sourness this contest left.

This awesome gal named Nancy Upton decided to enter the contest as a joke and as a big fuck you to American Apparel for being pretty insensitive. Her pictures mocked the idea that some people have of fat girls; that they only eat and lounge around. She ended up winning the popular vote. I'm only now blogging about this since she was interviewed on the Today Show this morning and revealed that American Apparel has invited her to see their warehouse in L.A. but only after writing her a smug, arrogant open letter.

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This isn't the first time American Apparel has had it's run-in with strong-minded plus-sized girls. A few years back, model (mostly of the erotic kind) April Flores, was told by American Apparel that 12+ sized women were "not in their demographic". It really upsets me when stuff like this comes up. It's kind of a back-and-forth thing with me since I want to lose weight for several reasons, one being to fit into cute clothes, and the other side that just wishes that retailers would offer more stylish/affordable clothing in my size! I've also been paying more attention to advertising lately and so much of it that's geared to women also comes along with the idea that you should be thin. It's a struggle, but when I feel unsexy and meh I can now look up to chicks like Nancy Upton who don't take shit from NOBODY, not even BIG retailer giants.

-C.M. xx

SHIT THAT ANNOYS ME: Sandals with ankle warmers

I'm probably not the coolest person out there. Well, that's actually a big understatement. I'm not hip or in. I sometimes might act grandma-ish about new things/trends I don't understand and well, those things might annoy me so now I'm going to bitch about SHIT THAT ANNOYS ME. First up are these sandals with ankle-warmer things on them.

What... What does? Who the? THIS IS FUGLY. I apologize deeply if you have these, and sure you can give me shit about being some narrow-minded, no-style bum but these make no sense to me. What the hell is this? The 1920s? Can't show your ankles lest the townspeople think you a slut!

Oh, come on, really? What the fuck? These would be cool if they were apart of some Star Wars outfit, but that's really the only reasonable situation in which it would be OKAY to don these.

Keep your toes fresh and your ankles nice and toasty. I guess? What baffles me more about these shoes, if you can call them that, is that they've been around for awhile yet people CONTINUE TO WEAR THEM. What exactly is the appeal?

-C.M. xx